You are not a failure – Celebrating your Trys

no such thing as failure
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If you have been familiar with my work you know that I always say that there isn’t a point in time when you are “done,” when life will magically fall into place perfectly forever. The essence of life is having ups and downs. Disappointments (big and small) are inevitable. You are always learning and growing, becoming more aware of your true self.

I want to share my recent personal struggle with you. Even when it appears that someone has it all together, they still worry and beat themselves up occasionally for mistakes they make. As long as you are living, life will always throw you obstacles. At times we have spiritual amnesia and forget who we truly are.

I made a rather deep financial investment in my business which did not pay off for me. Due to some mistakes I made by not asking the right questions upfront or getting certain terms in writing, this investment turned out to be a failure. For the past few months I kept obsessing over how I could have invested that money in other things or even going on a nice vacation with it instead of throwing it away. I was beating myself for not being a smart business woman and questioned myself if I had what it takes to be a big success. How could I possibly make bigger decisions after making such a huge error in judgment and ignoring my intuition?

In my meditation every morning, I invite people I admire into my virtual mastermind meeting and ask for them for  insight. (This practice is something I highly recommend for any goal you have – it is very powerful. ) This morning I was thinking of Oprah and all the struggles she overcame to follow her passion to be a teacher and successful business woman. She transmitted this message to me, “You are going to make mistakes…celebrate the trys.”

Her message resonated with me so strongly that I wanted to share it with you because I hear from my clients and customers all the time about how they failed in attempts to improve themselves and still feel like they are broken or unlovable. I, too, used to feel like a failure when it came to love; I tried everything but nothing ever seemed to work for me.  I focused only on results (or lack thereof) and never celebrated my trys.

When I finally met Roberto, I saw all the work I did over the years finally come together. Nothing I did was left wasted and I was prepared for the greatest love of my life. I didn’t see the fruits of my labor until I was able to fully experience a healthy relationship. So even if you feel like you failed a dozen times in relationships, personal growth, or your dating tactics, celebrate the trys.

Many self-help authors and even our friend, Yoda will say “there is no try.” But the word actually gives you freedom because you let go of your attachment to one particular action working and you just keep on trying. Every try is a success because if you don’t get what you intended, you always get wisdom from the try. If you celebrate your trys, there is no such thing as failure.

You were born perfectly human and divinely unlimited. Your actions and results in life will never add to or take away from the true essence of you. You are not a failure and neither am I no matter what happens to us out there in the world. The important thing is that you step out and give it a go. The knowledge and wisdom you gain from your try is often greater than what you actually wanted to get in the first place.

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  1. Ingrid Elfver
    411 days ago

    Gorgeous Debra,

    Wonderful transparent article… Yes, making mistakes is often the path to success… we all have to learn what NOT TO DO as much as we learn WHAT TO DO… so both lessons are powerful… and equally important… there is no failure when you learn and keep moving forward…

    I am just so grateful you are listening to your wise, powerful incredible business woman… you are truly AMAZING…

    ADORE YOU amazing you…

    Ingrid


  2. George H
    399 days ago

    Too bad being born perfectly human and divinely unlimited and thinking that I’m not a failure no matter what happens out there in the world has absolutely no positive effect on my bank account.

    (Ok, I can imagine these types of comments are unwelcome so I’ll get lost now)

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